Following your husband on “Facebook” threatens your relationship. How do you deal with jealousy? | Mirror
Most wives worry about their husbands’ Facebook activities, and some may want to monitor their husbands’ phones to protect their husbands from falling into the trap of other wives.
Previous scientific research mentioned the extent of the negative impact of using the “Facebook” application on the marital relationship, since the activity of one party on “Facebook” in the other party creates a feeling of threat, dissatisfaction and anxiety due to the disruption of the marriage. Likewise, other research conducted on respondents from South Asia, Europe and North America has shown that they affect intimate relationships between spouses.
The “Facebook” application was accused for years, until the journal “Cyber Psychology, Behavior and Social Networks” published the first study that monitors the effect of jealousy when using “Facebook” on the one hand and satisfaction with the results confirmed that satisfaction with the relationship negatively affected when the first party is connected to the “Facebook” application, which generates a feeling of jealousy in the second party and makes it follow the activities of the first party on the application.
This was the first study to find that attachment to Facebook is not a direct cause of marital deterioration, but rather a partner’s perception of the other’s activity on the social network.
And the universities of Guelph and York in Canada teamed up to track jealous people’s perceptions of their spouse’s Facebook activity, studying a mostly female sample between the ages of 17 and 24 to find a link between the amount of time their partners spend on Facebook, and their jealousy in response to such behavior.
Men were not concerned, while women expressed fear that their husbands would become attached to the app and would be jealous if other people posted on their husbands’ wall.
Women are more aware and concerned
Research has tended to study jealousy as the main driver of conflict between spouses in the “Facebook” era. The American Psychological Association (APA) published last September the results of a study conducted by the Department of Psychology and Sociology at the Carlos Albizo University, on the behavior and feelings related to jealousy, as a result of the husband or wife’s use of the “Facebook” application.
The researchers recruited 300 men and women, with an average age of 32, who had been married for at least a year and provided that the partner had an active Facebook account, to measure 22 dimensions of app use in a romantic relationship.
95% of couples report getting upset if their partner checks their Facebook feed during dinner, during an argument, before bed, or when the family is out.
Most of the participants expressed anger to their spouses using Facebook, feelings of jealousy and being ignored, but that was the worst. The participants’ belief that their spouse’s use of “Facebook” could lead to betrayal or lies motivated them to monitor their spouse and those with whom they communicate on social networks.
This study revealed a difference in how women deal with men in this conflict, and the researchers put forward another explanation for this difference, that women’s high expectations about the value and quality of pleasant time between spouses make them expect longer and better times with their husbands. , while men do not understand – or ignore – Signs of deteriorating marital relations.
Women in that study – and in previous studies – achieved higher levels of jealousy than men. The British study divided those affected by jealousy, with women coming first – regardless of how secure they were in their husbands or themselves – followed by people with low self-confidence, and people who are in problematic love relationships.
All affected individuals engaged in spying on their partners more than once a day, in order to protect their relationship from imaginary or real threats, but the surveillance backfired against the wishes of those who practiced it and was the reason for the end of the relationship.
Perfect solutions are recommended by experts
We cannot get rid of feelings of jealousy if they are born in us, but you can avoid the consequences of your husband’s Facebook activity by applying the following tips:
- Your feeling of jealousy and threat increases your husband’s use of the “Facebook” application if your relationship is immature, or is younger than 3 years, or you met your husband through the same application, and in these cases you should: reduce the use of “Facebook” and give your relationship a chance to mature away from those fights.
- A report on “Psychology Today” advises you to avoid seeking the friendship of your husband’s friends and to resist seeking the history of their relationship with your husband, to avoid misunderstandings, jealousy and suspicion as a result of unclear readings. comments between them.
- You are more likely to follow your spouse on Facebook if the amount of time they spend on the app increases or if it interferes with your time together. Avoid getting to that stage by coming up with a joint plan to mitigate the impact of social media on family members’ communication and reduce phone use during family gatherings, in the bedroom and at the dinner table.
- Avoid watching your husband on Facebook or attempt to control its Internet connection; Because these behaviors represent psychological aggression against the husband and can lead to divorce.