Saudi Man Attends Her Graduation ‘After Her Death’ … Another Dives Her Because She Has Cancer
Although we Arab news channels and social media are busy closely following the progress of the World Cup in Doha, sometimes we read about human stories far from the world of the World Cup, at the top of humanitarian news and these stories become a hashtag – the interaction of news and the center of events.
A few days ago, the Al-Arabiya channel published news about the extraordinary humanitarian attitude of a Saudi lawyer named Muhammad Mutlaq Al-Ashiqer, dean of the Faculty of Law, founder and former academician. Muhammad attended the graduation ceremony of his wife, who passed away from an illness a few days before the date of receiving the honor.
This is what the news text says: In a scene of love and devotion, Muhammad Mutlaq Al-Asheger, dean of the Faculty of Law, founder and former academic, tried to hold back tears as he announced the name of his wife, who died before her university honoring ceremony, but they tears refused to come out as soon as he received the Certificate of Honor. Al-Ishaiger described the day of tribute as “a day that my wife, my beloved and I, may God have mercy on her, have been waiting for a long time. Her ambition was to finish her master’s degree, even though she was employed, and that ambition remained until she found a college that fulfilled her ambition. With seriousness and diligence, she began studying during the Corona pandemic, and she finished her studies by writing a master’s thesis “in the course of the disease”, in which she received all the praise and admiration.
He added: «I was with her at all stages of her studies, and God helped me to support her financially, psychologically and intellectually until she reached this stage.. Then I applied to attend the graduation ceremony shortly before her death , I felt fear after that request and was afraid that she would not be present at the honoring ceremony, which actually happened. She didn’t get all the results before the ceremony, and I told her she got her master’s degree while she was dying, and she smiled a smile that broke my heart.”
And he continued: “God ordained her to go a few days before the graduation ceremony, and I wished she would be present and witness her success for herself, and this thing still makes my heart sink.” The husband says: “I came because I called her Anna, because for me she was me, because I believe that even if I left this world, she is still in my heart and I feel her presence around me.”
Loyalty and partners in betrayal
He continued: “Despite the physical fatigue and mental pain at that time, I felt the necessity of my presence, as if there was something pushing me strongly from the inside. She deserves this honor and deserves my presence. She is an example of honor, appreciation, love and respect. “
The doting husband noted that he graduated from 3 universities, “and I didn’t attend any graduation ceremonies, and her honors ceremony is the first honors ceremony I’ve ever attended, because her honors and graduation ceremony meant everything to me.”
The lesson of fidelity presented by Muhammed Mutlaq Al-Asheger is unfortunately an exception and does not apply to all men in our “patriarchal” Arab world. Lebanese journalist and writer Pascal Sawma published an investigative report on the website of the Mediterranean Network for Feminist Media entitled “Under the pretext of satisfying their physical needs… Men abandoned their wives on the day they got cancer.” Among the painful stories, the investigation mentions Zainab, “60 years old”, whose “disease stole the sparkle in her eyes, and her eyes receded. and her mental state. But she still tried to protect her family with the remaining energy in her body exhausted by cancer, which was compounded by kidney failure, for which she was forced to have one of her kidneys removed. Zainab went to therapy sessions and returned to preparing food for her children, as if to reassure them that nothing had changed. But on the other hand, her husband was planning something else. Under the pretext that she was no longer able to fulfill his sexual desires and demands, the husband decided to marry another woman a year after the beginning of the woman’s troubles, not caring about the impact on her psyche and health. state.
Pascal Sawma’s report talks about the effects of psychological stress on the course of the fight against the disease and the improvement of the state of health. He points out that palliative care is a treatment method that alleviates the symptoms caused by cancer, rather than curing them, and improves the quality of life of patients and their families. Palliative care can help people live more comfortably. This is much-needed care in places where the proportion of cancer patients is high and in the later stages of the disease, when the chances of a cure are low.
In the face of these scientific facts, it is only possible to imagine how a cancer patient would feel when her husband leaves her or replaces her with another, as if she were just a useless thing, not caring about the return of it to the image of a woman. yourself and your mental and health condition.
A study published on the Al-Jazeera Net website found that a woman is six times more likely to be separated or divorced after being diagnosed with cancer or multiple sclerosis, compared to a man. The study came to this conclusion when it examined the role that sex plays in what is called “partner abandonment.” It was also found that the longer the marriage, the more likely they were to endure the disease. In the same context, another study found that the overall rate of divorce or separation among cancer patients was 11.6%. However, the researchers were surprised by the difference in the rates of separation and divorce according to gender. The percentage when a woman was sick is 20.8%, compared to 2.9% when a man is sick.
Commenting on this, a doctor who follows this phenomenon says: “The cases we see clearly testify to how husbands cope with the illness of their wives without the need for social analysis or statistics. During the cases I have seen and dealt with over the years at work, when the wife sick, she often sees her companion, sister, mother or even brother.” But if the husband is a patient, then the rate is close to 100% and the wife will follow him. Even more than that, when the husband suffers from kidney failure and needs a kidney transplant, then the first volunteers to donate will be his wife. In case if a woman suffers from the same thing, then he will not be a husband. Unfortunately, in a large part of what I have seen, the possibility of donation is put first.
Of course, no one chooses their destiny. Illness is not an option in the first place, but a partner on life’s journey is a choice of mind and heart, and leaving one from the other in time. trouble is the beginning of a defect in the concept of partnership. And it necessarily abandons moral and religious duty in all laws and cultures. Of course, this also applies to the wife, who in turn can leave her husband at the first health or economic setback.