My Experience with a Narcissistic Spouse – Summary on Egypt
My experience with a narcissistic spouse
My experience with a narcissistic husband was very difficult and painful, and I still suffer from its consequences. Having understood the difficulty of living with a narcissistic personality and the psychological pain a woman experiences with a narcissistic husband, I hope this will benefit you and help you to change and solve the problem. I decided to present to you my experience with a narcissistic husband through this topic. Via Egypt Brief website.
My experience with a narcissistic husband
My experience started about 3 years ago, after this love story, I often dreamed that our love story would end in marriage at that period of my life when I married the person I loved during my studies and the dating period lasted about 5 years. .
He was always kind and sweet and the soul of my heart, he was everything to me, he needed a life in my dreams, his spirit haunted me wherever he went, his voice like a dime would buy me a good day, I missed him.
He always made good promises, I imagined my life with him as in paradise, his compassion helped me overcome all the difficulties I faced in life, and I mentioned his name a thousand times in my prayers and supplications.
Although I saw some flaws in his personality, I always interpreted them as acceptable, each of us has flaws that a lover must accept and live with, he always looked at himself differently with a kind of arrogance and grandeur.
I saw these traits as a reflection of his self-confidence and self-worth, they were never interpreted as narcissism or pathology, and although these traits sometimes bothered me, they never reached the point of breaking the relationship or at least questioning it.
We finished college and graduated and my overall grade was higher than yours. I didn’t hide from you the anger I saw in your eyes, but he immediately hid it and didn’t think much about it, and I explained it. There is a kind of human nature and our best sense of power in all things.
Read also: Marital experiences with a 60-year-old man
How did my narcissistic husband change after marriage?
He proposed to me after graduation and it didn’t surprise me. Our marriage was a dream that I wanted to achieve, so I immediately accepted it and we got engaged and it lasted for about a year, and then we got married. With this step, I dreamed of living a full life full of happiness and security.
But unlike what I imagined him to lead a romantic and peaceful life, he started ignoring me, it was too late and he barely came when he came back, and even if I talked to him about anything and had a conversation between us, he always he was amused by my ideas and saw me wrong or the argument turned into a fight.
I endured this situation myself, since I had financial problems due to our marriage or pressure at work, I would often give him reasons, make excuses and show him double emotionality in the hope that he would go back to his old ways. What I thought and dreamed about before in my life will also come true with him!
The first year of our marriage was going through the same situation. I was just patient and wrote. I write everything since I was little. I love writing and I can express it more than people. My dear soul, you will love him and his messages.
Whenever I could not speak of my trouble, I always turned to him, comforting him whenever I feared to be safe between his letters, I felt as if my fears were erased from my heart as I wrote, and no one accepted such . The article gently accepted me.
In the second year of marriage, God gave me a girl who was the lifeblood of all my sufferings, and I hoped that her arrival would change something in me, but it was getting worse and my situation was getting worse. My husband always thinks too much about my upbringing and takes everything I say or do wrong.
I talked to him a lot to find out why so much change? And who do I live with? How can anyone be so lying, there is something in me that refuses to believe that he is a lying and hypocritical person, and I will show you all about narcissistic personality traits in the following lines.
Read also: My marriage experience from Egypt
What does narcissistic personality mean?
The first thing I encountered during my experience with a narcissistic spouse was the definition of narcissism, a term used for people who see themselves as the center of the world and universe, with arrogance, arrogance, and often deception. Hypocrisy and manipulation.
In addition, people with this personality are always good-natured and unlike others, they always deceive people in a strange way, which makes you fall in love with them easily, always relying on deception and hypocrisy to get what they want.
Research has shown that narcissistic personality disorder, better known as NBD, is approximately 70% more common in men than in women, and that narcissistic personality is often a reflection of feelings of worthlessness and self-loathing.
What are the characteristics of a narcissistic husband?
During my experience with a narcissistic spouse, I compared the narcissistic personality traits to those of my husband and found that the narcissistic spouse generally has a persistent sense of arrogance, which has reached a level of selfishness that has led to feelings of inferiority. Empathy or humanity in relationships with others. With her narcissistic husband:
- Inflated sense of self-importance: He always liked to exaggerate his self-esteem and his actions to the point of arrogance, as well as feel the greatness of his opinions and his insight into any matter, so he felt wise and prudent. Expert in everything.
- A Life of Illusion: His constant need for exaltation and praise gave him an exaggerated sense of gratitude, which allowed him to create his own world to live in. He sees himself as the best human being in this world, without whom it would be a disaster. It happened.
- He constantly felt the need to be praised: he always liked to be praised for every job he did; Even if his behavior was wrong, I had to express my admiration for him and make him feel sorry for him!
- She always felt she deserved the best: All she wanted was to be in my place, for her rejection of my business principle was not at all without reason, and her sense of deserving the best prevented others from doing anything fair, and that is especially why my experience with a narcissistic husband started at the beginning, was the goal.
- Selfishness and exploiting the environment for his own benefit: since all these years he always occupied me with what kind of fraud he is and how hypocritical he is, that I realized that he is boastful and deceitful because he loved him over me. Giving me freedom, feeding on my love to notice her narcissistic feeling.
- Fulfilling his wishes by everyone: He commanded me many things during our marriage and I had no room to express my objections or reservations in any way, these were mandatory orders that I never had to mess with and their wishes were always fulfilled.
- Indecisive Pessimist: My husband was indecisive, sometimes I saw him calm and chatty, sometimes grumpy and grumpy, and he vacillated between ill will and meekness.
Also Read: My Experience of Marrying a Married Man
Why is he called a narcissist?
Since I kept reading all about the narcissistic personality, I was very concerned about why it was called that. It is said that there is an old legend about a young man named Narcissus who had attractive and beautiful features. As usual, he loved seeing his reflection on the face of the puddle.
Until he fell into the water and drowned and became a victim of his love, that’s why every person who loves himself excessively was called a narcissistic person, and that information was one of the information that I liked the most. Thanks to my experience with a narcissistic spouse.
Steps of my experience with a narcissistic husband
I searched a lot for solutions that can improve my relationship with my husband, and these tips were:
- Earn his love and don’t criticize him all the time: If you don’t criticize your husband all the time, then praising his actions and behavior will reduce the severity of the problem a bit, because the narcissist doesn’t accept and doesn’t see his mistake. to himself by mistake in the first place; That’s why he needs constant praise.
- Explain his shortcomings indirectly: a narcissistic husband is always jealous of the merits and success of others, because he sees himself as the most deserving and because of his vision and self-confidence he reaches the highest positions. .
Therefore, she should talk about her shortcomings indirectly and with great care, before talking about her strengths and pleasant qualities, and then tell her about these shortcomings secretly and privately.
- Pay attention to it and try to improve it: by the nature of the narcissistic personality, they are very happy to hear words of praise; So use this point by praising him and thanking him for the smallest things he has done for you or your children Say that you want to improve the relationship between the two of you; It could be a good attempt to change.
Also read: My experience with love marriage
Summary of my experiences with a narcissistic spouse
Every method to mend me with my husband failed, though I tried and gave him more than he should have, he came back to me without any benefit or change that I noticed in him, and I went on. It took me several months to realize that all these attempts had failed.
I did not stop writing to him, complaining and telling him everything that happened every day when I lived with him, and nothing changed except for the worse, and I often asked the newspaper: Will I be freed from the chains that bind me in his name? Love? Will I be freed from the despair that gripped my soul?
I saw my passion for writing in decisions I doubted I could make. Yes, I will be freed from her bonds and back to myself, my busy self back, and my heart back after years of playing with it. And my controlled mind will return.
This little calmness between us does not satisfy me, nor does it satisfy the childish affection, nor even the haughtiness of the woman in me. I deserve to live together. In fact, I decided to get a divorce and after all the mental anguish I decided to get a divorce. I painfully broke up with him to find redemption and write the last lines of my experience with a narcissistic husband; I know very well the difficulty of the path I have chosen, and I am also aware of my great need for power.
But I have never been and never will be a weak person, because they are truly weak, they accept insults and overwhelming frustration, they are surrounded by thoughts that they cannot and cannot do, but I have a mind that will get me through everything. These challenges start all over again.
We are now divorced and my experience with a narcissistic spouse is over, but there is still something stuck in me that I don’t know, maybe impulsive bits of fear or happiness at the height of their attraction, maybe crumbs. It turns my situation upside down from people waving at me.
The impact of the experience on my life
But in the end, even though this spectrum revolves around me, I have sad and sad moments. After all, these are only moments, small periods of pain that woke me up and woke me up to the fact that everything I went through with my narcissistic husband was enough to drain my soul, but it was a war and it was over. With my victory.
That was the result of my novel, and after the divorce I spent a lot of time perfecting my language and writing, drawing all my experiences and experiences with my narcissistic husband into the novel. Same name and my daughter was very well placed and supported me.
A smile and a loving look was enough for me, and the desire for this child to grow up in a healthy and balanced environment always encouraged me to try and do my best.
Read also: Characteristics of a sensual man
For this reason, I have shared my experience with a narcissistic husband. I hope that it will be useful to some of you and help him make the right decision. In this, I have shared everything about his personality and his narcissistic traits.